I knew Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Everyone dies.

There I said it.

I'm a big feeler. I have lots of feelings (which is a blessing and a curse, just ask my mother or my boyfriend). However, when celebrities die I don't get too sentimental, because, let's be honest, I don't personally know them. I am sympathetic to their families and love ones for such a personal loss but I don't get too hung up. (However, when Heath Ledger died I was struck with sadness simply because I don't think he had a fair chance at fulfilling our true love). 

But the recent death of Philip Seymour Hoffman had (and still has) me speechless. My heart sank. I believe that I knew him. I believe anyone who saw his work knew him; he was truly loved for the art he produced. 

Was it his eyes? His voice? He was chubby and certainly not your typical Hollywood stud, but I found him charmingly alluring and curiously handsome. His voice sounded so real. His characters were real. He was so real. 

I'm finding it so hard to know what to say. I just loved him as an actor and it's so sad to see him go.

I mean, of people to go why him?

For me, a loss of life over drug addiction is personal. I've seen addiction. I've seen it ravish human souls and consume them wholly, leaving you with the shell of someone you used to know. People become arrested by some dark mass and taken away. Against their control. 

I miss him and I haven't even seen him in anything since The Master.

But still...

He emulated the truth and art of acting so much that I felt like I knew him. When I see his photos and look at his face, and his eyes, I'm washed over with sadness. 

What a terrible loss. I know this shit reads as melodramatic to some people but I just don't care. I feel sad about this.

Rest in Peace. Your skill will always be remembered.

EDIT:

I'm an asshole for not saying this earlier.

My good thoughts and prayers go out to his children and the mother of his children. 

I pray for their recovery from such a tragic loss.